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Posts Tagged ‘relationships’

Unpacking

August 22nd, 2017 Comments off

I don’t handle confrontation well. Or communicating my wants/needs/emotions. This is not a secret.

I talk very logically about good communication in BDSM relationships all the time, but when it comes down to applying that in my own life, I often come up wanting.

It’s partly how I was raised. Growing up, my mother would try to get me to talk it out, but when she didn’t have the answers I was looking for, I’d get frustrated and shut down. My father’s response to any negative emotion was “walk it off.”

“Stop wearing your heart on your sleeve, Rayne,” he’d say. “You’re giving everyone all they need to mess with you.”

And I took it to heart and started doing my best to keep everything bottled inside.

I was already a good candidate for borderline personality disorder (BPD). Add in the stilted emotional development, and I was a shoe-in. Read more…

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NS(K)Q: Q70 – How do I know?

January 23rd, 2017 Comments off

NoStupidKinkQuestionsGandhi said that if you want to change the world, you have to be the change you want to see. To that end, Insatiable Desire brings you No Stupid (Kink) Questions, a series of questions asked by novice kinksters around the web. If you have a question for us, leave it in comments, or send it to rayne (at) insatiabledesire (dot) com with “NS(K)Q” in the subject.

Question 70:

I do a lot of dating site dating. It’s just as much of a clusterfuck as you can imagine. It’s like people on dating sites think other dating site users are just sex dolls waiting around to pleasure them. And the dick pics! Ohhh the dick pics. Don’t these boys know that if we want to look at their dicks, we’ll ask? Anyway…this is how I found BDSM. One of the profiles I was looking at mentioned it, and I googled it, and now I’m really intrigued. But I don’t know what, exactly, I’m intrigued by. Like, do I want to be a domme or a sub? Do I want to be spanked or do the spanking? I DON’T KNOW!!! So that’s my question. How do I know?

The simple answer is trial and error. Read more…

He cheated.

December 23rd, 2016 Comments off

So, like every other annoyingly cliché couple who thinks they’re way more adorable than they are, M and I play the “I love you more” game. You know…”I love you.” “Yeah, well, I love you more.” “Nope.” “Yep.”

It has recently been brought to my attention, by way of a coffee mug I didn’t know he ordered, that M is a great big cheating cheater.

See?!

We had to order some new sheets, and some light timers, and he got me an apron because I’ve been wanting one forever so maybe I can not ruin my clothes when I’m cooking. But I knew about all those things. I was expecting those things.

Then I opened the box, and there was this mug! And I cried because I cry about everything sweet these days. And then I told him he’s a great big cheater. And a liar. Because clearly, I love him more.

A Day In The Life…Or Something

September 28th, 2016 Comments off

Caught! Little fucker.

Caught! Little fucker.

Today, we moved the litter box upstairs. And by we, I mean me.

Yes, litter box, singular. I realize the general rule is one cat, one box, but M doesn’t want two boxes. Is adamant that we not have two boxes. So we’ve got one.

We moved it for everyone’s comfort. We originally put it in the bathroom because why not, right? There was room, and we poop in the bathroom so why shouldn’t the cats poop in the bathroom? Plus, with the litter box in the bathroom, I’m forced to clean it every day because it’s right there in our faces, and who wants to take a bath with a stinky litter box? Not me, that’s for sure.

I mean, not that I go more than one day without cleaning it. That’s just gross. And Bash insists on stepping in the poop and then walking it all over the house, so even if I wanted to go more than one day without cleaning it, I can’t, because that little turd will spread his turd love everywhere.

I don’t want your turd love, kitty. Read more…

Categories: Rayne Tags:

Blog Digest: e[lust] 82

May 18th, 2016 Comments off
Photo courtesy of Teachers Have Sex

Photo courtesy of Teachers Have Sex

Welcome to Elust #82

The only place where the smartest and hottest sex bloggers are featured under one roof every month. Whether you’re looking for sex journalism, erotic writing, relationship advice or kinky discussions it’ll be here at Elust. Want to be included in Elust #83 Start with the rules, come back June 1st to submit something and subscribe to the RSS feed for updates!

~ This Month’s Top Three Posts ~

Take Me

How Do I Love Thee:On Comparing Relationships

Asking all the questions…

~ Featured Post (Molly’s Picks) ~

Erotic Fiction: Fishnet Queen

I Manage My Expectations

~Readers Choice from Sexbytes ~

*You really should consider adding your popular posts here too*

Wanna Have Sex With Me? – Here’s how
All blogs that have a submission in this edition must re-post this digest from tip-to-toe on their blogs within 7 days. Re-posting the photo is optional and the use of the “read more…” tag is allowable after this point. Thank you, and enjoy! Read more…

Categories: Rayne Tags:

Kinktionary: Kink

May 12th, 2016 Comments off
 found on elaisted.com

found on elaisted.com

Webster defines “kink” as “unconventional sexual taste or behavior”; in other words, a fetish. That’s probably the most used definition, especially in mainstream media.

In the kink community, “kink” is also used as a sort of catch all for nontraditional sex practices, fetishes, and relationship dynamics. Some well known kinks include (but definitely are not limited too) a foot fetish, BDSM play, water sports, master/slave relationship dynamics, and spankings.

Though BDSM is a kink, not everyone who is kinky is into BDSM.

You can find a user-created list of fetishes here on Fetlife (requires login, free registration). Keep in mind, though, that there are quite a few fetishes there that were created tongue-in-cheek and some that are inside jokes.

Got a suggestion for our Kinktionary? Leave it in comments or email it to rayne@insatiabledesire.com with “Kinktionary” in the subject!

Categories: Kinktionary Tags: