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Posts Tagged ‘conversations with Master’

So we’re watching this paranormal show…

July 25th, 2012 1 comment

…and they’re on Native American land.

Master says, “My Indian name can be Master Little Dick.”

I reply, “I think a better name for you would be Master Head In Ass.”

He says, “Nah. It just doesn’t really scream me.”

 

Conversations with Master: Curves

June 18th, 2012 2 comments

A friend of ours stopped by and the first thing out of his mouth was, “Whoa, M! You’ve lost weight! I can see it in your face!”

I waited for him to say something to me, and when he didn’t, I was disappointed.

When he left, I said to M, “See everyone can tell you’re losing weight, but no one notices I am.”

Today, he said, “Don’t worry. If they bent you over and fucked you from behind, they’d notice you’re losing weight. You’ve got curves you never had before. Damn.”

I’m less disappointed now. =D

<3

Sometimes…

July 30th, 2011 5 comments

So I put my knitting on the arm of the couch, and the yarn ball rolled down the couch to M’s leg and fell on the floor. He yells, “Wait! Wait!” all frantic, but doesn’t even move.

I just stared at Him for a minute before He yelled, “I tried to stop it!”

“Master Philosophy” and Cornering Myself

September 29th, 2009 9 comments

FraidyCatGah.  I eventually apologize to everyone.  Even when I wasn’t wrong.  It’s pathetic.  Cin’s not letting me do it this time.  Thanks, Cin.

Anyway…

I’m clumsy.  And spacey.  And I was born blond.  Common sense? Yeah, it’s not always my forte.

So neither of us was too incredibly surprised when I dumped the entire single-pot bag of coffee into our freshly cleaned coffee maker this morning.  What’s wrong with that, you ask? Our coffee maker doesn’t need an entire single-pot bag of coffee when it’s freshly cleaned.  It only needs, probably, 2/3 – 3/4 of the bag.

True to form, Master felt the need to lecture me as He does every time I make a mistake, spill something, trip or run into something. Read more…