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Posts Tagged ‘body positivity’

NS(K)Q: Q63 – I have a disability. Can I BDSM?

March 11th, 2016 1 comment

NoStupidKinkQuestionsGandhi said that if you want to change the world, you have to be the change you want to see.Β To that end, Insatiable Desire brings you No Stupid (Kink) Questions, a series of questions asked by novice kinksters around the web.Β If you have a question for us, leave it in comments, or send it to rayne (at) insatiabledesire (dot) com with “NS(K)Q” in the subject.

Question 63:

I’ve been interested in kink for a while. I finally got up the courage to poke around on Fetlife and see if I could find someone I’d be interested in playing with, and pretty quickly found a potential partner. But then I told him that I have a physical disability, and he told me that I can’t participate in kink. Without disclosing too much of my medical history, I can tell you that my disability doesn’t limit my day-to-day activities, but does limit the amount of time I can be bound before I find myself in excruciating pain. I know this from experiments with self bondage. But I still want to pursue BDSM. Can I do that, or is it somehow against the rules?

Honey, you can do whatever the fuck you want with your body, and don’t let anybody tell you any different.

But stay away from that guy because he obviously isn’t comfortable with playing with someone with a disability. I mean, maybe he could be, eventually, with some patience and practice. But it doesn’t sound like he wants to go through all that, and really, that’s his right. It’s shitty, and sort of ableist, but…I mean, do you really want to be topped by someone who doesn’t want to top you? I don’t.

And probably, you weren’t even considering trying to talk that guy into topping you, anyway. It just needed to be said in case someone in a similar situation is trying to talk someone into topping them. Read more…

Top 100 Sex Bloggers 2015

March 8th, 2016 Comments off

Remember Rori’s Top 100 Sex Bloggers list? Sadly, Rori’s blog (and the list) has gone on hiatus. But never fear! Molly from Molly’s Daily Kiss took up the tradition. And here’s this year’s list! Make sure you check out #21. πŸ˜›

New Voice of the Year Award

This award goes to a blog that is new this year and therefore have not been around long enough to qualify for the Top Sex Bloggers list. After much sole searching I have decided that there are two winners of this award this year.

Melina Greenport: I discovered her blog through Wicked Wednesday and have fallen increasingly in love with her sexy, intelligent, beautiful writing. Seriously, if fabulous erotic fiction is your thing then this lady is going to rock your world.

Exposing 40: Exposing 40 has launched herself into the blogging world with style, grace and passion. Her site is a body positive adventure, centred around life in your 40’s. This blog is an unashamed look at, not only her body, but both male and female guests and challenges the traditional ideals of youth = beauty/sex and I am really looking forward to seeing where this project takes her in 2016.

And now with the previews done lets launch ourselves into the main event! Read more…

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Fat Acceptance: What It Is and Isn’t

November 10th, 2014 5 comments

I recently shut off comments on posts that were more than a year old. I’m kinda bummed about it because I really love my old posts, and love hearing from new readers as they get further in my archive. But when the number of people only commenting on 4-year-old posts that talk about me being fat (to tell me I’m too fat to be a slave and/or fat acceptance is wrong) or getting in trouble (to tell me they never get in trouble) began to outweigh the number of people telling me they’ve been helped by my old posts, I realized it was time to shut it down. But that doesn’t mean I can’t talk about it.

Some things you need to know before I start this rant:

  1. I’m still fat.
  2. I care even less about your opinion on my weight now than I did four years ago.
  3. I’m writing this to teach you what fat acceptance is and isn’t, not to defend my weight. (see point 2)
  4. Comments are moderated on this blog because our spam filter is mediocre at best. However, any comments left on this post berating me or someone else for being fat will be deleted. Keep the conversation on point. Period.

So four years ago, a post on Humbled Females that said fat women are slaves to food and not their owners (in other words, you can be too fat to be a slave) was brought to my attention, and I wrote about it. Read more…