Kinktionary: Paraphilia
Paraphilias are not to be confused with fetishes.
Got a suggestion for our Kinktionary? Leave it in comments or email it to rayne@insatiabledesire.com with “Kinktionary” in the subject!
Paraphilias are not to be confused with fetishes.
Got a suggestion for our Kinktionary? Leave it in comments or email it to rayne@insatiabledesire.com with “Kinktionary” in the subject!
Gandhi said that if you want to change the world, you have to be the change you want to see. To that end, Insatiable Desire brings you No Stupid (Kink) Questions, a series of questions asked by novice kinksters around the web. If you have a question for us, leave it in comments, or send it to rayne (at) insatiabledesire (dot) com with “NS(K)Q” in the subject.
Question 70:
I do a lot of dating site dating. It’s just as much of a clusterfuck as you can imagine. It’s like people on dating sites think other dating site users are just sex dolls waiting around to pleasure them. And the dick pics! Ohhh the dick pics. Don’t these boys know that if we want to look at their dicks, we’ll ask? Anyway…this is how I found BDSM. One of the profiles I was looking at mentioned it, and I googled it, and now I’m really intrigued. But I don’t know what, exactly, I’m intrigued by. Like, do I want to be a domme or a sub? Do I want to be spanked or do the spanking? I DON’T KNOW!!! So that’s my question. How do I know?
The simple answer is trial and error. Read more…
Gandhi said that if you want to change the world, you have to be the change you want to see. To that end, Insatiable Desire brings you No Stupid (Kink) Questions, a series of questions asked by novice kinksters around the web. If you have a question for us, leave it in comments, or send it to rayne (at) insatiabledesire (dot) com with “NS(K)Q” in the subject.
Question 69:
Recently, my mistress and I went from d/s to m/s. I’ve never been a slave before, but I thought I’d give it a shot. Problem is, now that I’m a “slave,” she just up and disappears for weeks without giving me any indication of where she’s going, or how long she’ll be gone. Or she’ll tell me she’s going to the store, and show back up at my house three days later. She doesn’t call, or take/return my calls while she’s gone. Is this normal? Because I don’t know if I can be a slave if this is normal.
No, this is not normal.
Being the M in a M/s relationship does not absolve a body of responsibility to the s in the relationship.
Imma say it again for the people in the back.
Being the M in a M/s relationship does not absolve a body of responsibility to the s in the relationship. Read more…
Some couples arrange puppy play dates for their “pets.” And there are even puppy play park parties where groups of people into puppy play get together and the human puppies can engage in play with other human puppies.
Some folks won’t have sex with their partners while they are in puppy mode because they feel it is akin to bestiality. Some believe that when their partners are in puppy mode, they cannot actually give consent. Others believe it’s only role play, and incorporate puppy play into their sexuality.
Got a suggestion for our Kinktionary? Leave it in comments or email it to rayne@insatiabledesire.com with “Kinktionary” in the subject!
Gandhi said that if you want to change the world, you have to be the change you want to see. To that end, Insatiable Desire brings you No Stupid (Kink) Questions, a series of questions asked by novice kinksters around the web. If you have a question for us, leave it in comments, or send it to rayne (at) insatiabledesire (dot) com with “NS(K)Q” in the subject.
Question 68:
So the other day, my owner and I had a huge fight. It doesn’t happen often, but when it does, it’s painful. This time, I can’t bring myself to back down. Something happened outside of our relationship that caused some issues for me, and I wanted to stand up for myself, but he wouldn’t let me. I’m angry, and hurt, and I feel like he doesn’t care about what happens to me. How do you handle things like this? Am I overreacting?
That’s rough. I’m sorry you’re having a hard time, right now.
Without knowing the whole situation, I can’t really say whether or not you’re overreacting. I mean, if the something that happened is something small, like someone accidentally stepped on your toe and didn’t cause any damage, then yeah…you’re overreacting a little bit. But if it’s something big, like being disrespected, or discriminated against, or abused in some way, then I feel like you’re not overreacting at all. Read more…
Sub frenzy can inspire unsafe behaviors, and has been known to cause a new submissive to jump into the deep end before they know how to swim. It is an excitement similar to New Relationship Energy, in that a submissive who has just discovered submission, and felt that click we all feel when we find something that suits us perfectly, wants to do all of the submissive things right the fuck now, kthxbai.
Sub frenzy is not necessarily a bad thing, but it can occasionally cause submissives to go overboard with trying new things, or make them appear overly eager. The best way to combat sub frenzy is to pace oneself.
Got a suggestion for our Kinktionary? Leave it in comments or email it to rayne@insatiabledesire.com with “Kinktionary” in the subject!