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Kinktionary: Free Man

February 25th, 2016 Comments off

imagesFree man is a Gorean term for a man who is not enslaved. In the Gor books, Gor is 100% a man’s world, putting free men right smack at the top of it (beneath the Priest Kings, of course).

Slaves, regardless of gender, are expected to defer to all free men in all things, whether or not the slaves are owned by the men with whom they interact. For example, if a slave is running an errand for her owner, and a free man stops her to have his way with her, the slave has no recourse but to explain what happened and beg for her master’s mercy if she’s late in returning.

Free women are also expected to defer to free men, but their deference is different from the deference of slaves. Where as a slave is expected to follow a free man’s orders, a free woman is not. She is, however, expected to defer to a free man’s opinions and decisions.

Because of this culture, the most shameful thing a free man can do is allow himself to become enslaved. Most free men would rather die in battle than be enslaved by their conquerers because death is more honorable than being a slave.

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Kinktionary: Kajirus

February 18th, 2016 Comments off

92933-coverA kajirus is a male slave on Gor.

Male slaves are a rare find in the Gorean series. This may be due to the patriarchal culture which places male slaves below even the beasts of Gor because they’ve allowed themselves to become slaves. Men on Gor are supposed to be strong and their will unbreakable. It would be less shameful, on Gor, to die in battle than to be forced into slavery.

In the books, male slaves on Gor are usually enslaved by their conquerers in war, or as punishment for committing a crime against their city. They are usually used for hard labor, though some are employed as house servants, and some (very few) act as pleasure slaves to Free Women. It is rare to find a male slave who was abducted from Earth.

Male slaves are much more prevalent in Gorean role-play circles than they are in the books. In real life, male Gorean slaves are predominantly pleasure slaves.

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Kinktionary: Kajira

February 11th, 2016 Comments off

3315588636_cabfc93c90_zKajira is the Gorean word for a female pleasure slave. In Gorean tradition, a kajira must do everything in her power to bring her owner pleasure. This ranges from cooking and cleaning, to sensual dances, to sex. However, the life of a real life kajira looks very different than that of a kajira in the books.

In the books, a kajira’s duties are not limited to her master alone. A slave is a slave is a slave. Kajirae (the plural form) are required to defer to all Free People regardless of gender or ownership. While all slaves are owned by someone (a slaver, a private owner, a paga tavern, etc.), it’s considered bad manners to deny someone the service of your slave. This means that often Gorean slaves are raped by strangers while running errands for their owners, which leads to the slave being punished for being late. It’s rare that the Free Man is punished for the rape, but when he is, it’s usually for “theft of goods.”

This is not the case with real life kajirae, because in real life, slavery is illegal and anyone claiming the slave title retains the right to consent.

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Kintionary: Gor

February 4th, 2016 Comments off

Tarnsman_of_gor_vallejo_coverIn a series of fictional novels written by John Norman, there exists a spaceship, of sorts, that is of similar shape, size, and climate to planet Earth. That ship is called Gor, or Counter-Earth.

Gor is said to orbit the sun in such a way that makes it invisible to those who inhabit Earth. This allows the creatures controlling Gor (Priest-Kings) and the humans who inhabit Gor to abduct people from Earth and force them into slavery. Generally speaking, the people abducted are female, and the slavery is sexual in nature.

From this series, an almost cultish fandom has formed, inspiring internet chatrooms, Second Life worlds, relationship dynamics, and even whole communities of people who choose to apply Gorean philosophies and customs to their real lives.

For some, the Gorean lifestyle is simply role-play; a way to scratch an itch (the master/slave relationship or sexual dynamic) they don’t feel comfortable scratching as themselves. For others, Gor is a way of life.

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Kinktionary: Funishment

January 21st, 2016 Comments off

photo by elaisted.com

photo by elaisted.com

Funishment, put simply, is punishment done for fun.

kaya, at UnderHisHand.com, explains funishment as a way to scratch the punishment fetish itch without resorting to unhealthy behaviors, like breaking a rule on purpose to elicit a response from the dominant. In her post, she discusses how occasionally (and at her master’s whim), she’ll be “in trouble” for something silly and unimportant. There will be “punishment” done in fun, and it might still suck balls, but the reality is no one’s mad. What she “did wrong” isn’t even really a rule (sort of). And the “punishment” is lighthearted and has none of the disappointment and strife of an actual punishment for actually breaking a rule.

However, in some relationships, all punishments are done in fun. Breaking rules on purpose (also referred to as ‘bratting’) is acceptable, and results in funishment. Some of these couples are firmly against real punishment, often citing domestic abuse as the reason (though there are others). Some, as in kaya’s case, have a punishment fetish. And some just enjoy funishment and/or prefer funishment to punishment.

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Kinktionary: Outing

January 14th, 2016 Comments off

So kink is kind of like Alcoholics Anonymous, in that you can talk about your involvement in kink, and you can talk abstractly about other people involved in kink, but you can never, ever tell anyone anything that would give away the identities of other people involved in kink. No one. Not any one. Not your mom, or your best friend, or your doctor, or your therapist, or your priest, or your lawyer (unless it pertains to a case you’re involved in). Not even other kinksters. Here’s why:

Unfortunately, society is still stuck on sexual taboos. Who knows where they came from or why they exist? We have a lot of guesses, and some are completely logical, but ultimately, the only thing we know for sure is at one point in our world’s history, sex was something people cherished and adored and talked about openly, and now, it is not.

Even worse are taboos surrounding “deviant sex,” or sexual behavior that steps outside of generally accepted norms. BDSM falls under that heading. And people are so incredibly terrified of people who have deviant sex (or so we assume…I mean, why else would we be persecuted so hard?) that asinine shit has been known to happen, like losing the rights to parent one’s children, losing one’s job, losing one’s home. So we keep our identities secret.

Informing Person A about Person B’s involvement with kink without Person B’s consent is called “outing”. And it’s a total dick move, bro.

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