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Archive for March, 2016

Definitely made a wrong turn somewhere.

March 26th, 2016 Comments off

M: I have to pee.
Me: You’re not allowed.
M: I am allowed, but I could make it so you’re not allowed again. That could be fun.
Me: That was never fun.
M: It was certainly fun for me.

Shit.

Note to self: Stop telling him he’s not allowed to do things.

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NS(K)Q: Q64 – Scene Didn’t Feel Right

March 18th, 2016 Comments off

NoStupidKinkQuestionsGandhi said that if you want to change the world, you have to be the change you want to see. To that end, Insatiable Desire brings you No Stupid (Kink) Questions, a series of questions asked by novice kinksters around the web. If you have a question for us, leave it in comments, or send it to rayne (at) insatiabledesire (dot) com with “NS(K)Q” in the subject.

Question 64:

I’m new to the scene, and I recently met a dom. He’s really sweet, and has about five years experience. We played for a while at a party, and he was great with me, but…well, I left feeling like something was really wrong. Like I’d been taken advantage of. There were a couple times during the scene where I know I should have said something, but I didn’t. And then, when it was over, he just left, like it was nothing; I was nothing. Did I do something wrong? Did he?

It kinda sounds like you both did something wrong, but hey, it happens. Which isn’t to say it’s nothing; it’s not nothing. But it also isn’t the end of the world. I usually try to chalk situations like this up as a learning experience.

The first thing I want to tell you is that you always, ALWAYS have the right to speak up if something happens in a scene that you don’t like. Most good dominants will expect you to speak up, and will actually be disappointed (and maybe a little hurt) if they find out that you didn’t. Read more…

Kinktionary: Sub Drop

March 17th, 2016 Comments off
Joelle Hood All Fours Frame Alt on elaisted.com

Joelle Hood All Fours Frame Alt on elaisted.com

There is a negative in all good things. In consensual BDSM play, that negative is sub drop.

Sub drop is a negative reaction to the end (temporary or permanent) of BDSM play. Often, it presents itself as depression or anxiety, but can also present as anger, feeling lost. How sub drop manifests depends on the person.

Part of the reason BDSM is enjoyed is because it increases endorphin production. Endorphins bind to the same receptors as opioids, which explains why subspace sounds a lot like being high. Your body reacts to endorphins the same way it would heroin.

Sub drop is a direct result of endorphin withdrawal. It can take 24 to 36 hours to notice symptoms. Many believe sub drop can be avoided by implementing aftercare after a play session.

Because sub drop is endorphin withdrawal, it can often be treated with a piece of chocolate, some exercise, or more play.

Got a suggestion for our Kinktionary? Leave it in comments or email it to rayne@insatiabledesire.com with “Kinktionary” in the subject!

Blog Digest: e[lust] 80

March 17th, 2016 Comments off

pennysblog_almost

Photo courtesy of Penny’s Dirty Thoughts


Welcome to Elust #80 

The only place where the smartest and hottest sex bloggers are featured under one roof every month. Whether you’re looking for sex journalism, erotic writing, relationship advice or kinky discussions it’ll be here at Elust. Want to be included in Elust #81 Start with the rules, come back April 1st to submit something and subscribe to the RSS feed for updates!

~ This Month’s Top Three Posts ~

~ Featured Post (Molly’s Picks) ~

No Take Backsies: Sexual “Politeness”
THE Process

~Readers Choice from Sexbytes ~

*You really should consider adding your popular posts here too*

He’s not a Tumblr Dom

All blogs that have a submission in this edition must re-post this digest from tip-to-toe on their blogs within 7 days. Re-posting the photo is optional and the use of the “read more…” tag is allowable after this point. Thank you, and enjoy! Read more…

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No Such Thing as Sex Positivity in Schenectady

March 15th, 2016 Comments off

It’s funny. It seems the harder we work for sex positivity in America (and the rest of the world), the less open Capital Region, New York is to all things sexual.

As most of you know, I live in Schenectady (skeh-neck-tuh-dee) County. Though lately people are calling it “Little New York” because of its crime rate, Schenectady, and its surrounding towns, don’t come close to the openminded atmosphere believed to be found in New York City. Acceptance, tolerance, and intelligence are at an all time low, here in the Capital Region. Sex is still something we don’t discuss. And being open about your sexuality has become something to be offended by.

What do I mean?

A few years ago, a bed and breakfast was closed down because it became common knowledge that the owner was hosting swingers parties and kink munches. There are rumors flying around about the reasons behind the city agreeing to force the doors closed. Some are saying that the B&B’s patrons were having sex outside, raising all sorts of hell, blasting the radio at ungodly levels till all hours of the night. People who frequented the B&B say those complaining about it are full of crap. But we all know, when a witch hunt’s afoot, people on both sides will say anything. Read more…

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Middle School Wisdom As It Applies to BDSM

March 14th, 2016 Comments off

Most of the things I learned in middle school didn’t sink in until I was an adult. Like when Mom repeatedly pointed out that if I kept things semi-organized, my day would go a lot smoother, or when Dad told us, over and over, that if we did things the right way the first time, we wouldn’t have to stop doing something fun to do them again later.

When I was a kid, me and my dad used to butt heads a lot. A LOT. I was a budding feminist, you see, and my dad is a good ol’ boy from Texas.

I actually feel kind of bad for referring to him that way. He means well. We just don’t see eye to eye on a lot of things, and especially most things political.

I can’t say for sure, but I think he’ll vote blue if the GOP puts Trump up as their nominee, so I guess there’s that. Read more…

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