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So I’m in trouble…

July 30th, 2015

Enjoying myselfOver not asking to fuck myself, of all things.

Like, not even not asking to fuck myself and fucking myself behind his back. Just not asking to fuck myself and not fucking myself. Pretty much ever.

It’s the weirdest fucking thing to be in trouble for.

Not because I shouldn’t be in trouble for it.

I am, after all, a pleasure slave, and it brings him pleasure to hear me ask him to masturbate, to decide whether or not I’m allowed, to watch me if he says yes, and then to decide whether or not he’s going to let me cum. He tells me that pretty regularly. I should be doing it because it brings him pleasure, if not because it benefits me, too. I mean, who doesn’t like to fuck themselves?

It’s weird because I’m constantly horny. My sex drive has far surpassed his lately. And yet, here I sit, not asking to fuck myself.

“The only place you’ve failed, this week,” he said, “is you haven’t asked to fuck yourself. You’ve been horny. You’ve made that pretty clear. But instead of asking to fuck yourself when you’re horny, you just…don’t? Why?”

I was in the process of setting up my little space on the floor next to him so I could worship him with my mouth. He allows me a blanket because we’ve got hard, cold floors.

I’m failing at that, too, if I’m to be honest. I’m supposed to start at his feet, but I’ve been skipping to his thighs. I’d blame the fact that this hasn’t been a thing for YEARS, but he hasn’t even complained (yet), so Imma just avoid looking a gift horse in the mouth, kthxbai.

I kinda ducked my head, and went all red in the face, and said, “Because I wanted to fuck you!”

This is not a good enough excuse.

There’s been no mention of punishment (yet), but he started threatening to make me suck him off every day and just not let me cum anymore since I’m obviously not interested in it.

Yeah, I’ll pass on that, please and thank you.

So! My (personal) goal, this weekend, is to ask to masturbate at least once. I started my period today. I don’t do period sex or masturbation, for the most part. I just don’t like it. But I really want to please Master. So this is basically my masturbatorial Everest. I’ll let you know how it goes!


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