Archive for April, 2015

And here I thought kink was all about consent.

April 22nd, 2015 9 comments

On FetLife (requires login), the ‘kinky Facebook’, a woman (we’ll call her Woman) accused her owner (we’ll call him Man) of rape1. And before I even read any of the responses, I cringed. I considered clicking away and pretending it didn’t exist. I didn’t want to be witness to the bullshit I knew was going down.

God, that’s gross. That’s as bad as the 85% of Swedes who just walked by a decoy car in which a recording of a woman screaming for help was being played while the car trembled and shook as if the woman was being sexually assaulted. Eighty-five percent. Though I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised, considering Sweden leads Europe in reported sexual assault cases.

The story goes like this:

Woman was a slave. She withdrew her consent. Man, her ‘master’, had sex with her anyway. Read more…

Categories: Rayne Tags:

Kinktionary: Consent to Non-Consent

April 17th, 2015 Comments off

consent-is-mandatoryIn February, we defined consent thusly:

“Consent, literally defined, is permission. In a BDSM setting, consent is the only thing separating sadomasochism from assault.

Consent is required for each and every act in a play session, sex, any touching, a relationship, collaring, setting a relationship dynamic, a change in relationship dynamic…Consent cannot be coerced or forced.

Consent in BDSM is a fluid thing, and can be revoked at any time. This means that at any point during a relationship or play session, a person (dominant, submissive, or switch) is allowed and expected to speak up when their partner delves into an area they’re not comfortable with. …” Read more…

Blog Digest – e[lust] #69

April 17th, 2015 Comments off

Photo courtesy of Sex Is My New Hobby

Welcome to Elust #69

The only place where the smartest and hottest sex bloggers are featured under one roof every month. Whether you’re looking for sex journalism, erotic writing, relationship advice or kinky discussions it’ll be here at Elust. Want to be included in Elust #70? Start with the rules, come back May 1st to submit something and subscribe to the RSS feed for updates!


~ This Month’s Top Three Posts ~

Bully for you
Watching Me
Red in Tooth and Claw

~ Featured Post (Molly’s Picks) ~

He’s Got Her
Subject/Object/My Desire

~ Readers Choice from Sexbytes ~

*You really should consider adding your popular posts here too*

Waiting with Snowdrops

All blogs that have a submission in this edition must re-post this digest from tip-to-toe on their blogs within 7 days. Re-posting the photo is optional and the use of the “read more…” tag is allowable after this point. Thank you, and enjoy! Read more…

Categories: Rayne Tags:

Happy belated birthday to meeeeeee! And stuff.

April 13th, 2015 1 comment

My birthday was last Monday. I am no longer lying when I tell people I’m 35.

I don’t know why I was so excited about 35. And now I am 35, and I’m all, “Haha I’m 35 and you’re not!” only just in my head because I’m pretty sure that if I started saying it to people for real, they’d think I’m crazier than they already think I am.

Hint: I am. Read more…

Categories: Rayne Tags: