Archive for February 20th, 2015

Kinktionary: Masochism

February 20th, 2015 Comments off


You can find the vid to go with this image at

One of the words referenced in the acronym “BDSM“.

Masochism is gaining pleasure, sexual or otherwise, from having pain inflicted on your person. Masochism has many levels, some of which are unhealthy. However, masochism by itself is no longer considered a mental defect by the medical community, and was omitted from The Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM).

Masochism, as it pertains to BDSM, is the enjoyment of having pain inflicted on your body with your full knowledge and consent, and sometimes your direction. A masochist may enjoy physical or emotional pain, or both. They usually derive some sort of sexual gratification from the act, but they don’t always.

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NS(K)Q: Q48 – Cumming Kills the Party

February 20th, 2015 1 comment

NoStupidKinkQuestionsGandhi said that if you want to change the world, you have to be the change you want to see. To that end, Insatiable Desire brings you No Stupid (Kink) Questions, a series of questions asked by novice kinksters around the web. If you have a question for us, leave it in comments, or send it to rayne (at) insatiabledesire (dot) com with “NS(K)Q” in the subject.

Question 48:

I know you say there are no stupid questions, but I feel like this is a REALLY stupid question.

I’m the Dom, and I’ve been doing D/s with my wife (of several years) for several months now, and I always have the same problem.

I’m a sadist and I really love to work on her. I love bondage and humiliation and she gets off on both. The problem is that after I come, I turn into a peacenik; I just can’t bring myself to hit or hurt or command or demand. If my sub is in predicament when I come, I instinctively rip her out of it like I’m rescuing her from Snively Whiplash. It’s a real scene killer.

How do I keep the kink going post-orgasm? Writing it out like this makes it seem silly, but it really is starting to be an issue.

Actually, this is pretty common. For many (top or bottom), sadomasochistic fantasies are wholly driven by sexual desire. Once that sexual desire is fulfilled, many find they’re no longer interested, or are embarrassed or ashamed by their fantasies. Read more…