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Love, or Lack Thereof, for an Abuser

October 26th, 2013 3 comments

image by Melen - click to enlarge

image by Melen – click to enlarge

The other day, when I was melting down, I said something like, “If you believe my ex, I ruined his life, too, until he got away from me.”

As if I should ever use my ex’s assessment as a testament to reality.

Later, when we’d managed to swing my head around to the way I should be facing, M expressed his concern.

“Why do you think about him so much?”

I didn’t want to answer the question. I mean, who would? No matter what the answer, the end result is I’m focused on my past and allowing an asshole to control my emotional state without even trying. I mean, I haven’t even spoken to him in at least 5 years, and I steady have nightmares about the shit he put me through, and the narrowly escaped shit he almost put me through. Read more…

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