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No Stupid (Kink) Questions: Episode 16 – You’re the master! (revisited)

October 22nd, 2013 Comments off

NoStupidKinkQuestionsGandhi said that if you want to change the world, you have to be the change you want to see. To that end, Insatiable Desire brings you No Stupid (Kink) Questions, a series of questions asked by novice kinksters around the web. If you have a question for us, leave it in comments, or send it to rayne (at) insatiabledesire (dot) com with “NS(K)Q” in the subject.

Question 16:

I’ve got this slave. I love it more than anything, and I’d love to keep it around. But it keeps ignoring the rules. I mean, I’m the owner. Shouldn’t my slave be doing at least some of what I say?

Disclaimer: Using “it” to refer to the slave in this article is my way of keeping it gender neutral.

Why, yes! You have read my answer to this question before. You can find the original post here: NS(K)Q: Episode 16 – You’re the master!

Here’s the thing. Back when I first wrote the post, in December of 2011, some folks had some concerns about my answer. At the time, I was riled about…something (fuck if I remember what), and couldn’t really see their point. Plus, it kinda felt like some folks were reading things into what I said that weren’t there. It happens. I do it sometimes. I may have done it with that post about Dan Savage’s opinion on monogamy. I make no secret of the fact that cheating is a trigger for me.

After reading the post and the comments again, I wasn’t sure it worked as a standalone piece, so I wanted to do a part two, of sorts, to iron some things out. Because I’m lazy, I’m going to use the comments on the OP to direct this revisit. Read more…