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Does it count as being “kept” if you do all the housework?

August 27th, 2013

imageNot long after we moved to New York, my ex was arrested and convicted of selling marijuana to minors. The kid who snitched was a 17-year-old with a promising sports career, a week from his eighteenth birthday, trying to get out of a possession charge. My ex was far from the big-time thug he was in Virginia, but we lived in a tiny town and the town government was afraid of him and all he represented.

They posted his name in the paper, which was not something they typically did, but they wanted us out of their town, and the best way to do that, they thought, was to make it impossible for us to live there. Unfortunately, the only thing they accomplished was making it impossible for me to find work or shelter with which to raise my children. I mean, my ex was in jail. By the time he got out, everyone had forgotten his name, and I’d finally managed to find a place after surfing on strangers’ couches with four children for a year.

It took literally losing everything we had (for the third or fourth time) in a fire for that to happen. The Red Cross probably saved our lives. Mine and my kids’, anyway. Their father was still in prison. You should donate to the Red Cross every chance you get. We do.

This was also the third or fourth time I’d found myself homeless because of something my ex did, and there were times when I couldn’t find a place to crash. So when I met Master, and before we even discussed BDSM beyond my acknowledging his interest in it, two of my hard limits were having stable finances and a place to live.

I didn’t expect to have a lot of money. I mean, between us, we have eleven kids. And I didn’t expect to not contribute. I wanted a job, and I didn’t care if the only thing our combined wages covered was food and bills, as long as we had somewhere safe to lay our heads every night. Being homeless is that scary.

So it’s no real surprise that, even though his paycheck covers our bills (and not much else), I occasionally find myself freaking out about the fact that I haven’t had a job since February. I bring in a little money, from time to time, and it always seems like it comes at the absolute best time it can come, but it’s not even a fraction of what I was making. And I was severely underpaid. So that’s saying something.

I express this concern to Master on occasion, and he gets annoyed. He likes for me to believe that he can provide for us in whatever way we need him to. Especially since he can right now.

But besides that, I’m his property, and he doesn’t like it when I work for someone else, ultimately giving someone else control of my day. So as far as he’s concerned, I should just accept this joblessness in a time when we can survive without me having a job, and move on. Not everyone is this blessed.

We go through this every time I’m jobless. I’ve spent a lifetime with feminist people around me who ranted about how women can now do more than be homemakers, and how not doing more with myself than being a homemaker is thumbing my nose at all the work they did for me, and that ultimately makes me worthless as a person.

But, I mean, besides society’s bullshit, Master works hard. I complain about all the time he spends working, but I know that if he didn’t work this hard, he would feel like he was pulling one over on his bosses—who, by the way, have been really good to us, outside of the fact that they work him too hard and make me miss concerts I really want to see. And I feel bad that he has to work so hard while I’m sat at the table, or wandering around the house following my dream of being a writer/slave.

The other day, I went to hug Master and he grabbed me by the hair and pulled my head back so I was looking into his face. Then he said, “You work for me, now. Is that clear? I don’t want to hear anymore about it.”

So I guess that’s that. I’m a kept slave. Sort of. I mean, I do pay him back with clean laundry, home-cooked meals, and blow jobs.

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  1. August 27th, 2013 at 18:14 | #1

    I think I have a slightly different take on this. While I own my slave and my slave is my property, I do not want to own her life. She is a highly educated professional, paid a lot of money for her education and can contribute much to society with her skills. Not only would it be selfish for me to keep her from working, it also gives her less of a chance to fulfill her professional desires. My slave loves me and it is her pleasure to see me pleased. IN my case, her having a successful career is something that pleases me. It makes our life easier and her life more complete. A happy slave serves well.

  2. August 27th, 2013 at 19:44 | #2

    @Herowner With all due respect, I’m trying to decide whether or not I should be insulted. Surely, you didn’t mean to insinuate that people without higher education and a conventional job do not contribute to society.

    Master doesn’t have a higher education. He’s a senior network engineer for a local ISP. Most people in our area couldn’t do their jobs if he didn’t do his. And while I don’t have a higher education or a conventional job, I contribute quite a bit to the world around me.

    As for his decision regarding his slave, I gave him the right to be selfish when he wants, even to the detriment of my happiness. And maybe on the outside, it seems like he’s taking advantage of that.

    The truth is, this is what I want to be doing. I love that I’m in a position to chase my dream. I just wish it was more lucrative for my own comfort. So I don’t feel like I’m a burden to my owner. He’s not willing to sacrifice his desire to have me home, taking care of him and the house while he works, to ease my mind. Especially when he’s of the mind that I should just accept what he’s told me. Which is, per our agreement, what I’m supposed to do.

    This is not to say that if we needed the money, he wouldn’t send me into the work force. He would, without a second thought.

  3. August 27th, 2013 at 20:41 | #3

    I am glad to hear that life is stable and better for you and your kids. Not having a secure place to live is horrible feeling that no one should experience. It also sucks not have a stable job I would love to have a full time job with benefits and have a steady flow of income I just got to keep on applying and praying. Don’t let the feminist make you feel bad about being a “Domestic Goddess”(Rosanne Barr used this term all the time)it is a full time job in itself. To me it sounds like you feel bad that your Master works all the time to support you all which is very understandable. If you do decide to go back to work tell master that its not about him not being able to care for you all its about you working so you can make up the difference of him cutting back on his hours so you can spend more time with him, that you miss him very much and if you working means that the two of you get to spend more time together than you will gladly be a working slave. Win/Win 🙂

  4. August 29th, 2013 at 14:57 | #4

    >@Herowner With all due respect, I’m trying to decide whether or not I should be >insulted. Surely, you didn’t mean to insinuate that people without higher >education and a conventional job do not contribute to society.

    I can assure you that if I had meant to say that, I would have said it. Nowhere in my sentence does it state that and I really did not think that I was so unclear that it would be necessary for anyone to go out on a limb and interpret my words.
    So let us revisit what I wrote:
    “She is a highly educated professional, paid a lot of money for her education and can contribute much to society with her skills.”

    The gist of that statement is that I honor her investment in her education. Not only the monetary investment, but also the investment of time and effort. Who am I to tell her not to utilize those things, pieces which are a part of her, which make her who she is? I love controlling my property, I do not love removing integral parts of her being.

    My comment was and is a reflection on how I see the “choice” your described to your readers. Some of my very best friends did not finish high school and they work in fields which are important to all of us doing things which I could not ever hope to be doing regardless of all the education I was lucky to be a part of.

    My sentiment was, that I am happy for you and him that you have come to this agreement, however I would have a hard time accepting it if anyone told me that I could not work. That has nothing to do with me being the dominant. If I was a billionaire and someone decided no billionaires should ever be hired, that would bother me. Simply because being in a environment outside of our own, contributing by doing things which do not serve our selfish nature is important to me.

    I hope that clarifies the issue.

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