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Does it count as being “kept” if you do all the housework?

August 27th, 2013 4 comments

imageNot long after we moved to New York, my ex was arrested and convicted of selling marijuana to minors. The kid who snitched was a 17-year-old with a promising sports career, a week from his eighteenth birthday, trying to get out of a possession charge. My ex was far from the big-time thug he was in Virginia, but we lived in a tiny town and the town government was afraid of him and all he represented.

They posted his name in the paper, which was not something they typically did, but they wanted us out of their town, and the best way to do that, they thought, was to make it impossible for us to live there. Unfortunately, the only thing they accomplished was making it impossible for me to find work or shelter with which to raise my children. I mean, my ex was in jail. By the time he got out, everyone had forgotten his name, and I’d finally managed to find a place after surfing on strangers’ couches with four children for a year.

It took literally losing everything we had (for the third or fourth time) in a fire for that to happen. The Red Cross probably saved our lives. Mine and my kids’, anyway. Their father was still in prison. You should donate to the Red Cross every chance you get. We do.

This was also the third or fourth time I’d found myself homeless because of something my ex did, and there were times when I couldn’t find a place to crash. So when I met Master, and before we even discussed BDSM beyond my acknowledging his interest in it, two of my hard limits were having stable finances and a place to live. Read more…

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