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I asked M for a vanilla blog.

August 3rd, 2012

There. I said it. I asked if I could cheat on you.

I even asked if we could do everything in our power to keep it completely disassociated from this part of our life. But not because of you! Because of me.

Things have always been rather on again, off again with regard to BDSM. He’s always owned me, but the evidence of his ownership is sometimes impossible to detect. I’m snotty (though usually I’m joking) and difficult to deal with, and he’s content to let me be that way. Sometimes because it’s fun to watch me react to him yanking up on my leash when I’m good and used to being able to do pretty much whatever I want. Other times because he’s not interested in micromanaging me.

These days, we’re pretty comfortable. We get out of the house when we can. We walk and talk as good friends should and do. We try to try something new at least once a week. We work in sex and SM as often as possible. And we drive in whatever direction the wind takes us when we need to get away.

But there are things I need to get off my chest that just don’t fit here. I mean, we do have a life outside of kink and sex, and some of it is better kept as far away from me as possible so people aren’t afraid to be associated with it.

And that’s when M asked, “Since when do you care?”

I think that’s a resounding, “No.”

Well, okay, so maybe I don’t care so much. But there’s something to be said for having a place to put down and put away the things that are bothering me that I can’t talk about here, for whatever reason. I think it’s time for me to start journaling again.

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  1. August 5th, 2012 at 07:56 | #1

    Rayne: I asked M for a vanilla blog.: There. I said it. I asked if I could cheat on you. I even asked if … http://t.co/LMjHpDvl #slave

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