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30 Days of Kink: Dom, Sub, Switch?

August 31st, 2010

30 Days of Kink

For the rest of this series, and links to others who have participated, click here.

Full prompt: Dom, sub, switch? What parts of BDSM interest you? Give us an interesting in-depth definition of what that means to you.  Basically define your kinky self for us.

A year ago, I asked almost the exact same question (log in required) on FetLife in a group I mod called Don’t Define Me (Come on in and gab with us.  All are welcome.  There’s never been any drama.  And I’m running out of topics to start, so start some! Lol.).  Not being one to ask a question and not answer it if I have an answer, I responded:

Right now? I guess submissive wife is the best title for me.

We’ve long since let the strict M/s fall by the wayside in the interest of saving our marriage. He still owns me. I still obey. But a lot of the rules and ritual was let go temporarily so I could get my head back above water.

That’s changing. We’re in the process of reimplementing rules and rituals that He let slide. Slowly but surely.

I’m looking forward to being a slave again.

I’m no longer just a submissive wife.

“Sexual Property” seems like the best description, these days.  While I do still maintain the house, and have other duties besides just the bedroom, M’s current training mostly surrounds sexual service.  The exception being His attempt at getting me back to a place where “Because I said so.” and “Because you’re the slave.” are acceptable answers in my mind.

Not that they ever stopped being acceptable answers in reality.  They haven’t.  He’s allowed to pull rank whenever He feels like it, and it’s my duty, if not my desire, to follow His orders/rules/what have you.  That’s one of the perks of being Master.

But for a long time after I left, M explained every tiny detail of our lives, from decisions He knew I wasn’t going to like, to life changes, to what we spent money on.  He wanted to make sure I knew He had no ulterior motives.  That He was doing what He thought was best for us as a master/slave unit.

These days, more often than not, He responds with “Because I said so.”  And I’m getting better about not replying, “But whyyyyy?” The leash is steadily tightening.  And I feel myself gnashing my teeth, and yanking at the end of my chain, and clawing at the dying light that was M’s leniency.

But I am owned sexual property.  And if it kills us both, He will tame me.

Mostly.  There are parts to my wild side He intends to keep around.

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