Archive for April 29th, 2010

Rights and Responsibilities

April 29th, 2010 3 comments

This is actually in response to a post made by rayne named On Productivity, Insanity and Grilled Cheese Sandwiches. For everything to be in context, it might be a good idea to give her post a quick read, if you haven’t already. Part of this post is a response directed at rayne, and some are general comments.

Limits and expectations are things that should be worked out prior to a collaring. Once someone has made a commitment, in my mind that commitment should be kept.

I know with rayne and I there was a good month (and more, this after our “courting” period) where I bothered her daily to make sure she understood what she was agreeing to. This was in person, not over the net or phone, and rayne was well aware of what she was agreeing to prior to being collared.

This is a matter of trust. There are always a lot of discussions about slaves being able to trust their Masters. Dominant men (and women) don’t corner the market on crazy. There are slaves every bit as dangerous, and unbalanced, as these crazy Masters.

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Categories: Blogs, Melen Tags:

Restless Insecurity

April 29th, 2010 2 comments

Things have been going okay here. No sudden meltdowns on my end, no baffling withdrawals on His. i’m still trying to feel around in my head, trying to sort out all the mixed signals i’m getting from my own brain. Emotional eating has resurfaced, but i haven’t been able to identify why. This is hugely frustrating to me. If i can’t even identify any anxiety or resentment, i can’t neutralize it and end the emotional eating.

i know something in my head is off. Everything seems slightly off-kilter now. i used to have a grand ol’ time pointing out cute chicks for Him to ogle. Now, i see Him appraise one and i squelch a sudden urge to drag her by her hair to the parking lot and rearrange her face, then come in and claw my name on His forehead so He can’t forget who He is with.  i’m not generally one for jealously and violent insecurity. Hell, i’ve shared partners in the past without much in the way of issues. So what is it now, that makes me getting all tetchy and anxious when He appreciates other girls? Why can’t i appreciate what i have with Him? Part of me thinks it’s territorial. i’ve struggled long and hard to find comfort and peace at His feet, and i don’t want to have to give it up or even share it with some new plaything. Which is darkly hilarious, given my penchant for threesomes and the fading hope of finding a sister for me. Another part of my rage regarding Him seeing other girls is the fact that i often don’t feel fully nourished or cared for at the moment, a hazard of the job of living with Him. It would infuriate me to be left at home, hungry for Him and lonely beyond belief, thinking of Him charming another girl, touching her like He used to touch me… but even more than the infuriating, i would be crushed. Possibly beyond much repair.

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Categories: Sojourners Tags: No tags for this post.

On Productivity, Insanity and Grilled Cheese Sandwiches

April 29th, 2010 3 comments

Yesterday was actually rather productive.  I updated our toy box (though I think I may still be missing some things), got a post sent out to Carrie for Eden Cafe, pitched my idea for my very own personal store through Eden Fantasys, fiddled with our list of affiliates (though I’ll be fiddling with it more when I get a chance) cause some of the banners disappeared, ordered the toys M and I provided for my birthday giveaway, ordered some stuff for us…

I’ve got lotion on the way, and new organic bath soap, and new lube, and new toy cleaner from Eden Fantasys.  And a new glass dildo.  And there’s supposed to be some neat new BDSM toys on the way from soon.

I’m behind on email notifications, so I’ll probably spend some time doing that today between writing reviews to post tomorrow.  I alphabetized my swap list and our toy box this morning because I’m neurotic.

It feels good to be productive again, rather than sitting here staring at the computer, doing mostly nothing.  Which is what I’ve been doing for the past few months.  I mean, granted, we’ve got a lot on our plate right now, but staring off into space doesn’t help that.  Mostly it just adds fuel to the fire.  Read more…

Categories: Rayne Tags:

Product Review: Glass Dreams Smooth Waves by Doc Johnson

April 29th, 2010 3 comments

32258-1Ooo, what’s that?

Okay, seriously? What’s up with these eight inch toys having foot long names? This is the Glass Dreams Smooth Waves from Doc Johnson.  And the design is pretty spectacular.  Especially for a former marble collector like me.

What’d it come in?

It comes in a clear plastic box with blue lettering and white designs around the outside.  The dildo itself is nestled inside molded clear plastic for protection.

How’s it made?

So if you played marbles when you were a kid, or just collected marbles like me, you’ll remember the swirly colors inside those tiny glass balls.  Turning the glass round and round, holding it up to the light, trying to follow the path of the swirls inside.

I’ve spent a lot of time doing that with this toy.  Read more…

Categories: Insertables Tags: