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Product Review: Warming Massage Glide by System JO

March 12th, 2010

Ooo, what’s that?

Every time a new massage oil shows up on our doorstep, M asks me a variation of the question, “Don’t we have enough?”

My answer? Not in the least.  I’m on the hunt for “the perfect massage oil” and let me tell you… System JO’s definitely on the right track.  This is Warming Massage Glide, a personal lubricant and massage oil, by System JO.

What’d it come in?

It comes in a clear plastic recyclable bottle with a black push-top lid.  It’s four and one-half fluid ounces.  The label is red and silver and lists a lot of hefty claims.

What’s in it?

Ingredients: polydimethylsiloxane, decamethylcyclopentasiloxane, octamethylcyclotetrasiloxane, dimethylsiloxane, hydroxy-terminated, capsium (cayenne), peppermint essential oil

Polydimethylsiloxane is sometimes called “dimethicone” and is often used in shampoo, contact lenses, elastomers, medical devices, caulking, lubricating oils and heat resistant tiles.  It’s clear, shiny and slick.  And it’s an organic polymer. 

Decamethylcyclopentasiloxane is odorless, colorless and non-oily.  It’s used in many personal care products to give skin a silky feel.  And it’s used in dry cleaning, in place of water, to rinse away dirt and oils.

Also an odorless, colorless, non-oily fluid, octamethylcyclotetrasiloxane is often used to make other silicones.  However, it’s also occasionally used as an additive in personal care products.

You’re just gonna have to look “hydroxy-terminated” up yourself.  I took chemistry in high school, but I’m not sure even back then I would have understood this process.  And that was… thirteen years ago.  Great googly moogly.  Something about adding low-weight molecules to cultures which “leads to an increase in the thermal stability, most likely by prolonging the condensation reaction and delaying the degradation reaction” (ACS Publications) in some compounds.  Way over my head, but that last about prolonging the condensation reaction totally makes sense.  I think.

What’s it for?

From the bottle:

  • Enhance your sense of pleasure
  • A silky, smooth feeling, never sticky or tacky
  • No taste
  • Super long lasting
  • Latex compatible
  • Can be used as a lubricant
  • Skin/tattoo conditioner

Directions: Apply a small amount of JO Personal Lubricant to genital areas.  For condom use, you may apply inside and/or outside of condom surface.  Compatible with latex condoms.  Use more if needed, or as often as necessary.

However, you don’t just have to use it on genitals! We use it as a massage oil, more often than not.

How is it?

Rayne’s Rating:
Pros: Cons:
smells amazing
feels amazing
lasts forever
a little syrupy at first

We absolutely love it.

When you pour it into your hand, it’s thick and syrupy in a non-sticky sort of way, which helps keep it from dribbling all over the place between the bottle and your partner’s parts.  However, if you let it sit in the palm of your hand for a moment, it warms up, thins out a bit and becomes slick and slippery.  Perfect.

I have sinus problems and get frequent migraines.  So I’m sort of addicted to peppermint, which is used in aromatherapy to cure… just about anything.  But especially things like sinus problems and migraines.  We keep peppermint oil in the house, and I rub it on my temples when I get a migraine.  I sometimes wash my hair with a mint bath gel from Kama Sutra when I have really bad tension headaches, and it’s almost instant relief.  Both of those, though, are so strong they sometimes burn my eyes just opening the bottles.

This massage oil has a light, sweet mint scent, closer to wintergreen than peppermint.  It smells like Sleepy Time Tea by Celestial Seasonings with a touch of honey and maybe a bit of cream.  And yet it doesn’t taste like a thing or leave a nasty film in your mouth.

Your hands will glide easily over where ever you choose to apply the product, but it won’t leave them feeling greasy.  A little goes a long way.  It lasts a really long time.  M says it warms better than Oil of Love.  And when you’re finished, and leave it alone, it begins to absorb into the skin, taking anywhere from five to fifteen minutes depending on how much you use and how long you rub.

Once it has fully absorbed, it leaves behind this deliciously silky feeling.  My normally dry skin starts to lose its perpetual itch almost immediately.

Like I said… We absolutely love it.

Anything else I should know?

Using this or any silicone based lube with the following materials may cause accelerated degradation and/or destruction of the toy:

  • lambskin
  • cybersilicone
  • cyberskin
  • futurotic and futurotic plus
  • loveclone RX
  • new supersoft
  • O2
  • opulux
  • passionskin
  • pleasureskin
  • poly-melt
  • private touch
  • pure skin
  • realskin
  • sensafirm
  • senso and senso plus
  • silicone
  • softskins
  • softtouch
  • superskin
  • technoskin
  • TPR silicone (not TPR)
  • trueskin
  • ultra realistic 3.0 (UR#)
  • vixskin

However, sometimes it depends on the toy.  If you’d really like to use it, spot test on a part of the toy you won’t be using and see how it reacts.  But personally? I’d just use water based lubes with these materials and save myself the trouble of possibly destroying a toy I really like.

Warning from the bottle:

If irritation or discomfort occurs discontinue use and consult a doctor.  Very slippery on surfaces.  Clean spills immediately.  Use with caution in bath or shower.

I store this product in its own ziplock bag.  You could probably toss it in a bag with all your lubes, or all your massage oils, if you want.  But I have a bad habit of getting it all over the outside of the bottle and just tossing it back in the drawer when we’re going to sleep without taking the time to clean it up.

Where’d ya get it?

Remember way back when when I was babbling about free gift cards just for joining a sex toy shop? I used that gift card to buy System JO’s Warming Massage Glide from MyTickleSpot.com.  They’re fairly new, but they have a really nice selection, including quite a few sex toys and sensual products I’ve never seen before.  Like the 18k gold clit stimulator and “gentlemen’s plug” and cuff links set from LELO.  And who can turn their nose up at an elegantly designed, woman-friendly, online sex toy store that began in a bagel shop? Certainly not me!

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  1. March 12th, 2010 at 14:04 | #1

    Nice review, I’m REALLY interested in checking this out now, I gotta admit!

    Good attempt with the “Hydroxy-Terminated” , however, you were misled right from the get go. “Hydroxy-Terminated” is an adjective, not a noun – but system Jo is implying it is a noun. Calling an ingredient “Hydroxy Terminated” is like a recipe calling for “Red” instead of “Red Pepper”. Boo on System Jo for doing that! I am sure its technically fine but its a little lame because it restricts the ability of you, the consumer, to look into that ingredient. So when you looked it up, you found info about what that adjective means in chemistry. That’s unfortunately of little relevance to how a lube or lotion behaves. I am so super curious now – I wonder what ingredient they really meant?

  2. March 12th, 2010 at 15:05 | #2

    @red Perhaps they’re all hydroxy-terminated? The silicones, at least. When I was searching, I found articles on a number of hydroxy-terminated compounds, which is where I got the information about the process I mentioned here.

    But yeah. More clarity would be greatly appreciated. Lol.

    It’s good stuff. I hope you like it, if you decide to try it. 🙂

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