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Updates, G-spots and Resolutions

January 9th, 2010


We’ve recently applied alot of updates, so if anyone notices anything weird, please let us know. I’m pretty sure everything’s functioning correctly, but you never know.

That elusive spot

Over the past week another “study” was released saying that the g-spot may not biologically exist. At the moment that headline flew across my Twitter app, I knew there would be a ton of backlash. I got into a little discussion on Twitter about it, but it’s really hard to express thoughts 140 characters at a time.

In my mind, who really cares what the reports say. If that’s what gets you off, that’s what gets you off. Unless you’re a very gullible person, reports that the g-spot doesn’t exist isn’t going to change anything at all about your sex life.

What I assumed, correctly, is that it wouldn’t remain a scientific or biological issue, but would instead turn into a male/female issue, and that’s exactly what I saw happen. During the conversation on twitter, someone mentioned that men were always trying to tell women it’s all in their heads. And therein lies my issue with it.

The g-spot either biologically exists or it doesn’t. The existence hasn’t been proven yet, or really disproven either, and whether it’s proven to exist at all is largely irrelevant in my mind. Turning it into a feminist issue, claiming that these reports are attempts by men to keep women down, is bordering on paranoia. Not everything is a conspiracy. It’s not a male/female issue, it’s a biological one.

My personal belief, based on the available information, is that some women do have a g-spot, and some don’t. It’s what makes the most logical sense. A report in 2008 found this to be true and was reported by The Sun HERE.

Accuracy is definitely important when it comes to health, sexual or otherwise. As far as I’m aware, the only accurate thing we can say about the g-spot is maybe it exists for some women, maybe it doesn’t. Regardless, hitting that spot on some women sends them into the stratosphere, and I’m definitely not arguing with that. 🙂


I’m not a New Years resolution kind of guy. I guess it’s always seemed silly that we choose one day of the year to resolve to make our lives better. It’s funny how your thinking starts to change as you get older. This year I’ve been thinking about 2009 and how to make 2010 better. So here’s a few resolutions I’ve come up with that I’m going to try to stick to:

  1. Photography – I miss photography. I used to go out alot with my camera. Work, and not currently having a car, put a stop to most of that. There’s actually sort of 2 resolutions that go into this category. I’m going to take at least one shot a week for posting on ID. This might be a single shot, or a series, but I’d like to have something each week. In fact, I’m going to try spending time with the camera at least twice a week (the second time per week might be non-bdsm related, such as landscapes and macros, with some experimental photography thrown in for fun).
  2. Blogging – I’m not very big on scheduled blogging. I do work on the backend of the site, so that’s usually my contribution. However, I’m going to try and get at least 2 blog posts a month up. I’m certainly opinionated enough to come up with topics.
  3. Podcast – I’ve been talking about putting together a monthly (or bi-weekly) BDSM podcast for at least a year. There just hasn’t been the time, but I want to get this going this year, preferably before March, which ties into the next resolution.
  4. Reduce my work time – I work alot. Excessively so. I regularly put in 18+ hour days, and it’s pretty much sucked every last bit of life out of me. I’m a very responsible person, and I won’t shirk my duties, but enough is enough. If someone can’t cover oncall, it typically falls to me. Overnight work? That’s usually me as well. Not after yesterday; it needs to stop. I have very little time to actually live life and spend time with rayne, and that has to change. Right now.
  5. Reading – I’m an avid reader, and I used to make sure to take at least a half hour before bed to do some reading. I’m usually so exhausted by the time I get to bed these days that I’ve had almost no time reading. The times I have forced myself to take the time to read, nothing stuck in my head because work issues were keeping me occupied. I’m going to take at least 3 nights a week and spend 30-60 minutes reading. The days can vary, but 3 nights a week minimum.
  6. Consistency – It’ll be no secret to anyone that’s followed our blogs that consistency is a problem when it comes to my training and control of rayne. Some of this, much of this, is due to my job. I work from home alot these days (because I get called to look at something before I can leave my house), but even on those days I’m on the phone 99% of the time, so very little attention can be paid to rayne. One way or another I’m going to work on consistency issues. I’m sure some of this rayne wont like, but … tough. 🙂 At least her place will be consistenty reinforced, and she will be molded into what pleases me.
  7. Getting out of the house – I work in system and network administration primarily, so my job is typically behind a desk at a computer. This means, especially with the crazy work hours I’ve been doing, we rarely ever get out of the house. I’ve noticed some significant problems because of this. Now, it’s damn cold up here right now, but I think it’ll be good for us to force ourselves outside at least 4 or 5 times a week, even if it’s for a quick walk down the street.

So that’s a lot of things, and I’m sure I’ll occasionally backslide, but I’m going to work on making these things a reality. I should have a new picture of rayne posted by this evening, and she’s already been told she’ll be posing for me today.

Hey look, I’ve already met one of my resolutions by posting, so we’re off to a good start!

Finally, I’d like to say welcome to our guest bloggers. I’m really looking forward to seeing posts from people who live a different version of the lifestyle.

Categories: Blogs, Melen Tags:
  1. January 9th, 2010 at 17:00 | #1

    I still love you more. ~shrug~
    .-= rayne´s last blog ..Chapter One: Meet Corianne – First Draft =-.

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