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Porn Review: Seven Minutes In Heaven: Coming Out! directed by Courtney Trouble

December 21st, 2009

Good Releasing Presents Seven Minutes in Heaven: Coming Out by Courtney Trouble at GoodVibes.comOoo, what’s that?

That? That’s my first queer porn.  My first gonzo.  And a lot of firsts for the people on screen, as well! It’s Seven Minutes in Heaven: Coming out! produced by Reel Queer Productions and directed by Courtney Trouble.

Who’s in it?

Well, obviously Courtney Trouble.  Then you’ve got Sophia, Tina Horn, Sarah Lee Sinful, Joline, Jae and Puck Goodfellow.

What? Don’t recognize some of those names? That’s because a couple have never been in porn and a couple more have never been in queer porn.

What’s the description say?

From the back:

Reality porn is coming out of the closet in this first-ever gonzo queer film.  Award-winning director Courtney Trouble invites seven diverse, fresh-faced performers to a kinky slumber party for fun and games… only tonight there are no rules, no limits and no bedtime! The amateur cast picks their own partners, their own sex toys and their own ways of getting off.  Spin the Bottle inspires an unscripted fuck-fest and first-time fantasies come true during a Truth or Dare strap-on sex scene.  With honest video confessions, 9 sex scenes, authentic orgasms and natural bodies, Seven Minutes in Heaven is the real queer deal.

So? What’d they do?

It opens with Spin the Bottle which spurs a lot of making out.  Next Sarah Lee Sinful gives Tina Horn a lap dance.  There’s a bit of pussy slapping and finger fucking.  Tina spits on Sarah’s pussy.  A lot.  Sarah was visibly nervous, but beyond that, she seemed to be genuinely enjoying it.

Another make out scene.  Pretty much a huge free for all.

Next, Jae and Joline with a lot of finger banging and a toy I couldn’t see.

There’s a short clip of a few of them outside smoking and talking about the next scene.  And Puck shows us this wicked cool claw foot bathtub ashtray that says something like “Cool your butts in our tub” or whatever.  And then Carson and Puck strap on a couple strap-ons and Carson brings out the crop.  Eventually Tina joins in and blow jobs are had by all.

We have a short clip of Sophia being taught how to put a dildo into a strap-on harness.  And then Sophia and Tina have their own strap-on scene.  Gigi makes an appearance and Sophia demonstrates just how wonderful she really is by using her to cum on camera.  The condom was a nice touch.

The next clip is Tina telling us how much she enjoyed working on this film, and then we move into Carson and Joline in the bathroom, where Iris peeked her head in… to Joline’s pussy.  Ba-dum-bum

We have five or six more scenes, each a little different.  They bring out a flogger and there’s a strap-on orgy and a game of Truth or Dare.  Puck feeds Sophia strawberries and they proceed to make out on the floor.  Jae blacks Puck’s boots while Puck and Joline make out.  And the film ends with everyone crashing on the floor together in various states of dress and undress.

And? What’d you think?

Rayne’s Rating:
Pros: Cons:
great music
safer sex
sort of slow
not our “thing”

The first time I watched it, I really couldn’t get into it.  Once we got beyond the make out scene that was spurred by Spin the Bottle, I was bored and had almost lost M’s attention completely.  We turned it off and pulled out some porn more up our alley.  So, I had to watch this while he was at work.

The make out scenes are hot, but I love watching people make out.  So unless there was, like, spit flying everywhere, I’d have been all over them anyway.

The music rocks.  Hard.  I absolutely adore it.

I am deliriously happy with the different body types and safer sex practices presented.  Hearing Sarah say, “The glove feels good!”, whether scripted or not, was pretty cool.

Tina Horn’s explanation about how to flog a back, making it clear, on camera, that they don’t just go all out waling on someone without knowing what’s safe, was a nice surprise.

You could tell everyone involved was enjoying themselves.  Even though the first-timers were nervous, they were still getting off on the experience.  I think that’s the best part of this whole DVD.  The realness.

I was highly amused at myself as I named the sex toys and lubes being used.  Iris and Gigi showed their heads, as well as, what appeared to be, Sliquid Sassy.

I really cannot get down with the whole spitting on the pussy thing.  Spit is just grodie.  It grosses me out when M spits on me.  I’m not interested in watching a huge wad of spit drool from one woman’s mouth into another woman’s cunt.

See? I’m gagging just thinking about it.

And the food thing? Yeah… Seriously, no.  I had to look away.  I’m not kidding.  Food + Sex = Also Grodie! In my world, at least.

The rough sex scene between Tina Horn and Carson was hot for a second, but then I started to lose interest.  And by the strap-on orgy toward the end, I was wondering if it was almost over.

All in all, it wasn’t awful.  It’s just not something I’m looking for when I’m watching porn.  I’d pay big bucks for their claw foot tub ashtray, though.  Seriously.  That thing is super hot.

Where’d ya get it?

The incredibly patient people at Good Vibes sent me Seven Minutes in Heaven: Coming Out! free of charge in return for an honest review.  Good Vibrations is a thirty-years-old sexuality product retailer based in San Francisco, California.  Its goals are “to model sex-positive attitudes and to promote sexual health and pleasure”.  To this end, they offer free product and sex education and have partnered with the Center for Sex and Culture.  You can read their Vision and Values and Sex and Gender Policy, as well as a brief history of the company’s development, on their site.

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