Archive for December 8th, 2009

On Genderwhatever

December 8th, 2009 4 comments

tumblr_ksg2xfgD7U1qzjgceo1_400A lot of people have been doing a lot of talking about gender identity.  Whether they identify as male or female or somewhere in between or neither.  What others identify as.  How they feel about things that are gender specific.  Some even have entire blogs dedicated specifically to what it’s like living genderqueer or genderfree or… genderwhatever.  I admit I’m not up on the lingo.

If I’m to be honest, I never really thought about it.  Haven’t been paying a whole lot of attention.  Just really… don’t care.  I mean, sure, I think people should be free to be or not be whatever gender they feel they are or aren’t.  I guess it just always fell under the heading of “Things I Believe but Don’t Necessarily [need to] Understand”.

I guess that sounds horrible.  But it’s really just not all that big of a deal to me.

I realize it’s huge to them.  Especially to people who are just realizing that they don’t really identify mentally as the gender their body chose to take shape as.  And I want to say, first and foremost, that I am not, in any way, trying to diminish that.  I can’t imagine how upsetting it must be to some not being able to reconcile their bodies with their minds.

Well, I mean, I can.  But not in that respect.

I also realize how difficult things are going to be for them if/when they “come out” to everyone they know.  I know and rail against the way they’re treated by ignorant people.  And I am all for giving them the same rights us “normal” people, with bodies and brains of the same gender, have.  Matter of fact, I demand it!

But for me, it’s never been a big deal.  People are who they are.  If they’re not total assholes, I don’t really care who that is.  If they’re decent people, then who they are doesn’t make me dislike them.  Live and let live, remember?

I wish everyone could be that way.  I really don’t understand why they’re not.  Oh, I know all the excuses.  None of them make sense to me.

I’ve never identified as anything but female.

I’ve always had “tomboyish” interests.  I liked sports and hated skirts, growing up.  I sometimes wish I were male.  Especially when the monthly monster comes to visit.  I’ve lamented the fact that girls have always been expected to be feminine, even when they really weren’t interested.  But my lack of interest in femininity is more how much work it is to achieve than what gender I identify with.  And for whatever reason, regardless of what my parents said, I never really assigned gender to chores or toys or clothes.

Maybe it’s because I never had a brother for my mother to assign the boy chores to.  Or because my interest in baseball prompted my father to, in jest, introduce me to his friends as his son. Read more…

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