Home > rayne > Well, poop. I miss it.

Well, poop. I miss it.

April 9th, 2009

I’ll probably get tarred and feathered for this one. But I’m not really caring right now. It is what it is and I’m okay with it.

I miss Gor.

For me, it was never about the role play. In most cases, the role play annoyed me. I still don’t understand why people have so much trouble just being who they are. I hate who I am and I don’t pretend to be someone I’m not. But some people enjoy it and that’s their prerogative. I don’t hold it against them. I just don’t get it. *shrug*

As much as I bitched about it, I loved writing dances and the only thing that really bothered me about the written serves was how frilly and sexual they have to be (We’ll not mention the fact that, even when we were in a channel that owned a plethora of “home slaves”, I was always the only one serving. Cause I’m the princess, dontcha know.). Seriously. How many waitresses do you know that bend over and shake their asses at the patrons while pinching a nipple with one hand and finger-fucking themselves with the other? Somewhere other than a sex club, that is.

However, I’m a writer by trade. So it was just practice in visualization for me. Learning how to better show emotion with actions and facial expressions rather than saying, “She was sad.” or something. Which I need. I suck at showing emotion.  

But that’s not even what I miss. I do miss the dances. I was good! But what I miss is the level of control. Not in the channels. I could care less about that stuff. At home. In real life.

Though at the same time, I was incredibly lonely. The kinds of people I enjoy talking to usually thumb their noses at people involved in Gor. And I don’t get along with most Gorean slaves online. In the channels, I usually just sat there quietly, ignoring the channel unless someone said something to me, wishing I could be somewhere that people liked me. Heh.

So many of them are prissy little princess slaves who lead their owners around by the nether regions and that shit just burns my ass. I mean… If you’re gonna claim to be a slave, then at least somewhat resemble what you’re claiming to be. And stop using your princess status with your own owner to try to get other slaves in trouble, cunts. Seriously.

The bitch-boy free men need to be slapped in silks and made to serve. Maybe from that angle they’d see how feminine they are and grow a pair. Instead, they cower before females in silk desperate to make them happy so they don’t run away. And the “kajiras” wield their slavery like a whip. Threatening to take it away at the drop of a hat.

That’s not how Goreans on either side of the spectrum are supposed to behave according to the books. The men are supposed to be honorable, manly and strong of mind at least, if not character and body (Note: Strong and manly is not synonymous with arrogant asshole.). The free women are supposed to be feminine, demure and, while their opinions are heard, the men have the final say. And the slaves are supposed to be obedient whores. Baubles. Not coveted precious gems.

And that’s where it all gets muddled. The online role players have got it so ass backwards that it’s not Gor anymore. I don’t really miss the online BS so much as the real life, day to day stuff. Like the positions, which really are beautiful, and the shortness of my leash and not having to explain to people why polyamory doesn’t bother me and the philosophies and… The things that matter and make sense to me.

You can keep the third person speech. I’m not really interested being bludgeoned with the distorted ego of a free man who forgot to take his balls back when his slave went to bed. I’ll pass on putting up with the bull shit entitlement syndrome and disgust of the free women (Which really translates to insecurity and jealousy… Take off your damn veil and put on some silks and quit your feckin’ whining, damn it.). Really don’t give a damn about the imagined aspects of Gor.

It’s the philosophies and dances I’d love to have back.

And you naysayers? Yeah, a lot of you live by the philosophies yourselves and just don’t realize it because you’ve never cracked a book. You see the role play, posturing, arrogance, third person speech and princess slaves and assume it’s all about frilly nonsense. At this point, I’m willing to deal with the frilly nonsense to find my place again. And I’m okay with that.

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