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Access to Friends and Family

March 26th, 2009

Do you have access to your family and friends or is it limited? Could you- or would you want to- serve someone who restricted your contact with others, or does that sort of control not affect your service?

Technically, my access to most people isn’t limited by Him. He’s never said “You can’t call soandso.” or “You can only call soandso this amount of times and/or for this long.”

I’m not allowed to  go places without Him without permission and He almost never gives me permission unless He really has no choice. Like if something has to be done during business hours and He can’t get time off. So if my friends want to hang out, they have to come to our house. Which sometimes becomes a point of contention because all our rl friends aside from the downstairs neighbor (who is on her way to becoming a KAP) are completely vanilla. But whatever *shrug*

My access to my ex and, by default, my children is limited by Him but there’s good reason. Since the day my ex found out things were getting serious between Master and I, he’s done everything in his power to regain control over me. I’m not really sure why. He’s married now and has children with his new wife. And he’s not controlling or abusive with her. So I don’t get it.

Every single phone call between the ex and I contains at least one ultimatum and ends in a lot of name-calling and accusations. He rips me to shreds. We’ve been separated for seven years, we’re both married and he still hashes out every single detail of our past. He questions all of my life decisions, past and present, and tries to find a way to force me out of my relationship with Master. Usually by using the kids. And he doesn’t even know Master beyond knowing His name and what He looks like.

It bothers me sometimes. I get so tired of being in the house all the time. He’s very much a homebody and it’s frustrating when I’m such a social butterfly. But it’s comforting and really aids in my self-control when it comes to the mental disorders I’m diagnosed with. So it’s all good.

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