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December 9th, 2006

Recently the person that runs a local [[BDSM]] mailing list I’m on requested that people contribute more to the list. I sent back a message saying that I don’t normally jump in unless there’s really something to say, due to the fact that my opinions are somewhat extreme. I then went on to give some examples.

One example was the fact that I feel that “submissive” and “slave” have distinctly different definitions, but I’m not going to talk about that here.

One of my other points is that I don’t necessarily believe in the “[[Safe, Sane and Consensual]]” phrase that so many in BDSM follow. Why? Well, “Consensual” is a no brainer, however I believe that a submissive and a slave give their consent at different times. What I mean is, I believe a submissive is continually giving their consent, while a slave is giving their ultimate consent when begging for a collar, and thereafter, unless released, there is implied consent throughout the relationship. Of course, I would expect that a real Master or Mistress would take a significant period of time making sure the slave understood that before collaring them.

However, “Safe” and “Sane” are not easily defined, and are totally subjective. Each person will interpret these words differently. As I said in my post to the local list I mentioned, one person new to BDSM may feel that using a bull whip on another human being is crazy, while another may feel that nailing tender body parts to a board is both sane AND sane! Who is right?

Someone else on this list responded asking if I thought [[RACK]] was a more appropriate acronym. Now this is one that I’d never heard of. It stands for Risk-Aware Consensual Kink. To me, this makes a much more appropriate [[mantra]] than “Safe, Sane, Consensual”. Being aware of the risks really defines whether an activity is “safe” and “sane”.

It’s important, whether involved in straight [[D/s]], a [[Gor]] inspired relationship, or just [[B&D]] for fun, to be aware of the risks relating to what you’re doing. For example, if you’re taking a whip or flogger to a submissive or slave, one knows to avoid the area of the kidneys, the neck, the lower back, and generally stay away from the spinal column. Everyone should do as much research as possible before engaging in any type of physical punishment or pain giving activity.

So, “RACK” it is, for me. It explains that we need to know what we’re doing. It admits we’re kinky. And it says that what we’re doing is consensual. Perfect!

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