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A Lesson Just Learned and an Observation of Self

March 3rd, 2006

Once upon a time, this one was told by a Man that when dealing with Free Men a slave shouldn't concern herself with what to talk about or how to keep the conversation running. That is the Man's job. The girl's job is to please him and with her jabbering on about every little thing that pops into her head instead of talking about what pleases him – what he chooses to talk about – she is doing both the Master and herself a disservice.

Along with everything else this person said to her, she shoveled it
into a box marked "Stupid Things Said By Jerks" when the friendship
between rayne's Master and this Man ceased to exist. After reading an
essay the other night, she's realized a couple of things. First, this
evaluation of the person is disrespectful, regardless of the situation.
He is a Man and whether he's a jerk or not is irrelevant as she is
slave (Master has pointed out a couple of times recently that, being
slave – and a Gorean slave, at that, it's not her place to judge Men
and their actions). And second, he's right.

rayne has a
tendency to get nervous and just go buzzing around like a little
overcompensating bee, bouncing of walls and people and whatever else
happens to be around, when she encounters something new to her. Men she
hardly knows out right hitting on her, meeting new people, etc. All of
it makes her shift in this "Pretend to be perfect and pro and talk a
lot so they don't know you're nervous" gear and she gets all sorts of
hyper and out of control and it's all she can do to keep her head (and
theirs, by the end of it) from exploding. Perhaps she should figure out
how to control that.

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