(This girl tried to write this earlier and was, in fact, almost finished with it, but her computer spontaneously rebooted itself and she has lost the website she was looking at. You"d think this would be a lesson to her to write these in something she can save them in before putting them here, seeing as this has happened to her a billion times, but she"s typing directly into the website again.)

rayne was clicking stumble a lot earlier and she found a site on which a slave was asked how she and her Master merge the two different facets (Master/slave and Hisband/wife) of their relationship. This one was rather annoyed when she finished reading because the slave didn"t answer the question. she danced around it with things that were related but when it comes right down to it, the question wasn"t answered. So rayne"s going to attempt to answer it herself. Remember, however, that everything in this blog comes from the perspective of a girl that was (and is in all things) a slave before she was a wife to her Master, so her point of view may be different than that of those who get involved in "the lifestyle" after they are already married.

Our readers would be correct in thinking that the "vanilla" concept
of marriage, in which both parties are equal in all things (such as
ownership, decision making, etc.), doesn"t mesh well with a
Master/slave relationship. A Master commands and a slave obeys. A slave
serves and a Master is served. A Master owns and a slave is property.
And that last means that everything that belongs to a slave, everything
a slave is, now belongs to their Master. This includes monetary value,
material possessions, outside relationships (be they plutonic or not),
etc. A slave may keep nothing from her Master. It doesn"t go both ways,
as the slave owns nothing and least of all, her Master. This makes it a
little difficult to be "equal".

So how can a Master and slave get married?
Well, some firmly believe that they cannot. Some believe that to love a
slave takes away from the fact that she is slave. They believe it makes
it harder for a Master to be objective in her training and easier for a
slave to manipulate the Master. And in some cases, they would be
correct. It took some self awareness and trial and error for rayne to
realize that she was being manipulative and using Master"s love against
Him and for Master to realize that He was being easy on rayne because
she was His wife and He loved her and with this love came the fear that
if He punished her too harshly or held her accountable for her actions
she would leave. It didn"t help that rayne was constantly assuring Him
that He wasn"t being easy on her (a little self-preservation that she
shouldn"t have been acting on) and that people that were saying these
things about married M/s couples were cracked.

So how is it resolved?
Well, it depends on the outcome you are looking for. If you want
immediate security and never want to worry that you may be too harsh on
your slave and as a result they might look elsewhere, then you go easy
on them and let them manipulate you and be happy knowing that they will
never leave because you were "mean". However, if you want a
well-behaved slave that isn"t manipulative, then you bite the bullet,
so to speak, and you say to hell with security. You are firm regardless
of the slave"s feelings and you are consistent regardless of the
slave"s attempts at manipulation, and eventually, security comes with
knowing that your slave wouldn"t dare leave using the excuse that she
was held accountable for her own actions.

Both are
risky. If you have a slave that is merely playing at being slave, the
former may keep her but the latter will definately make her run. she
will be happy when she"s allowed to do whatever she wants but the
second you make her do what she is supposed to she will balk and decide
to find somewhere else to be. If you have a slave that is real and
wants to be a slave, the former might make her run, but the latter will
almost definately keep her. she won"t be completely happy in an
inconsistent relationship because her belly craves a firm, harsh Master
as well as someone who loves and cherishes her. If you started out as
the Master trying to appease His slave and then decide to be the Master
that appeases Himself (and if the slave is happy too, great!),
retraining and reassurance might be in order. But if you have a real
slave (as opposed to a game-player) she will eventually become
comfortable in her position again and things will work out as they
should.

Unfortunately (or fortunately, as the case may
be), this is where you have to put to use the idea that a marriage, as
with most things, is what you make of it. Just as if you believe that a
marriage between two vanilla partners will work, it will, the same goes
for a marriage between Master and slave. While legally, the state views
the two of you equally, you yourselves can view each other however you
choose.

While legally, rayne is equal to Master, in our
life she is not. she is His slave first and His wife second in all
things. To be honest, this arrangement has saved her life at least
once. This one is extremely stubborn and, regardless of the pain she is
in or how ill she is, will refuse to go to the doctor. The last time
she did this, Master made her go, and sure enough, she was in danger.
Had she been His wife first and His slave second, she would have
refused to go, He would have let her, and she quite possibly would no
longer be alive.

The two facets of our relationship are
never seen as separate parts of it, and really never have been. The
marriage is, to rayne, an extention of her slavery. It, in effect,
makes her legally Master"s slave, not just His wife. Maybe not in the
state"s eyes, but in rayne"s (and she thinks in Master"s too). To be
honest, she was His completely without the ring. The ring just makes it
legal as well.